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Therapy Blog for Orem, Spanish Fork & South Jordan

Couples Counseling in Orem Utah

couples counseling in orem, marriage therapyCouples counseling in Orem Utah can help improve your relationship. Couples counseling is a place where you can learn to share what you are experiencing with your partner. It is also a place where you learn to hear your partner. It’s important to create this mutual understanding of each other so that you can grow together. 

 

Most couples default to what they have seen others do. They treat their partners the way it has been modeled for them. If you want to make your relationship strong, you have to be deliberate, however. We aren’t built to be alone. One of the first tendencies we have is to find a mate. However, that doesn’t mean that being in a relationship is natural and easy. The skills you need to make it successful can seem counterintuitive. 

 

Couples Counseling Deals With Both Of Your Emotions

 

For example, let’s talk about embracing your emotions. It’s crucial to recognize your emotions, feel them and then cope with them. This can be done with your partner to the point where it draws you closer together. It’s important to understand that there is a difference between your thoughts and your emotions. Most people share their thoughts, thinking that they are sharing what they feel. They say things like, ‘I feel like______’. This is a thought, even though the word feel is in there. Sharing your thoughts versus your feelings is a subtle way to distance and protect yourself. Healthy marriages learn how to be vulnerable and feel and share emotions. 

 

Feeling your emotions when they are uncomfortable seems backwards. Don’t you want to not feel these uncomfortable emotions? The healthy way, however, to let them go is to first feel them. You have to pick them up in order to let them go. You can’t move something or let go of something that you first don’t have. (Related article: Emotions 101: How To Be Healthy – Counseling and 3 Principles of Emotional Health – Use With Counseling). 

 

Couples Counseling Helps You Heal Together

 

Healing from past or current attachment injuries in your relationship happens together. It doesn’t have to be separate from your relationship. When your partner steps on your toes, it’s ok to say, ‘You stepped on my toes and that hurt’. You can say that, however, in an unhealthy way or a healthy way. The unhealthy way would be to tell them what to do or to be an expert on them (Related article: How To Communicate Effectively: Avoid These Two Communication Problems in Marriage). This only leads to fights. The healthy way would be to tell them what happened and what your emotional or physical experience is with what happened. In a healthy relationship, your spouse will respond to make it right. 

 

There are two different types of effective couples counseling. Our trained therapists offer both approaches.

 

Schedule a session for couples counseling in Orem. 

 

We also offer couples counseling at our counseling centers in South Jordan, American Fork and Spanish Fork. 

 

Written by Triston Morgan PhD

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